So, this was a clear indicator of the day I was having… eating Cookies and Cream directly from the carton- with a fork. Because, like everything else in my house, the spoons were all dirty. And it took way too much effort to wash one, or even grab a bowl, for that matter. Some days just warrant being completely, unabashedly slovenly.
It really wasn’t any one big thing that made the day so rotten. Satan often works that way, you know- no big, glaringly obvious issue. He sneaks in with smaller, subtler tactics… The mountain of laundry that may never be conquered. Snippy words exchanged with the spouse. Grouchiness leading to less-than-ideal attitudes with the kids. The bill that was forgotten. The unexpected expense that busts the budget. The two-year old that refuses to keep her diaper on (or use the potty) and the mess that follows. Crayons on the walls. Another glass of milk spilled. A broken dish. Middle school girl hormones and the drama that accompanies said hormones. Expectations left unmet. Lack of sleep. Crying, whining, and more crying.
Gradually I began to listen to the words Satan was whispering in my ear. I started to accept them, believing that I was failing as a wife, a mom, a teacher. I beat myself up mentally and emotionally day after day, counting my mistakes and listing my failures. I blamed myself for not doing enough and not being enough.
But God wasn’t done with me yet. In those moments of frustration and agony, He showed me beauty. Beauty in chunky arms around my neck. Beauty in crayon drawings made just for me. Beauty in my half-grown girls’ hand reaching to take mine. Beauty in sweet words of encouragement and admiration from my husband (and beauty in the take out he brought home for dinner!).
The Lord showed me grace as I poured out my heart. He showed me that I’m not alone as sweet sisters in Christ prayed for me, offered words of wisdom, and reminded me that we all have those days. He showed me that love- His love- still conquers all. He showed me once again that every day holds blessings and the hope that does not disappoint.
Here’s to a better day tomorrow… The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. -Lamentations 3:22-23