Zero Week is almost over!

Whew… by the grace of God and through His strength alone we have almost made it through our first week (okay, half a week, but feels like eternity) without Kirby.  Weird is the only word I have to describe it.  It’s weird to go to bed at night alone and wake up five hundred times and realize that you’re still alone.  It’s weird to get up alone in the morning, and to be responsible for everything on your own.  It’s weird to go through the day and have no idea what or how he’s doing.  It’s weird to get busy and remember something you want to share with him, only to be snapped back into the reality that you can’t just pick up the phone and call or text.  Being apart is hard enough, but this no contact at all is a whole different game.

Kirby did get to make his one phone call last night, and it was the worst call of my life.  He didn’t even sound like my husband… sounded so drained and defeated, and then within seconds was overcome with emotions.  Even typing it now hurts my heart in a way I can’t comprehend.  The worst of it was that I could hear his superiors shouting at him in the background, and he had to drop the phone before I could even utter a word of reassurance.  Needless to say, it was a rough night here.  That was the most helpless I had ever felt.  I wanted so badly to be able to call him later and just hear if he was okay, but there is no way to do that.  So I did all I knew to do… I prayed, and I got all of my prayer-warrior friends to pray.

Fortunately, despite my feeling of helplessness and my own defeated spirit, God heard those prayers and answered.  I got up this morning and was just overwhelmed by a calm that I haven’t felt in a few weeks.  There was this incredible sense of peace, and I woke up just knowing that everything is fine… such a God-thing.  When we give up on ourselves and give ourselves to Him, He fulfills His promises.  He fills us with His peace, His strength, and His grace, and when we allow that to happen, it is the most amazing feeling.

Now, that’s not to say that I’m not still upset, and I have no idea how Kirby is feeling right at this moment.  I’m trusting that God has filled him in the same way.  I still have those moments of weirdness, and sadness, and I still have two blue-eyed beauties who miss their daddy with every fiber of their being.  We all do.  There’s nothing quite as hard as holding your seven-year-old as she cries herself to sleep because she just wants to see her daddy, or trying to explain to a three-year-old that no, we can’t just call him and tell him goodnight, and he won’t be home tomorrow, or the next day, or the next day.  But I know that God will pull us through this, and that He is going to strengthen our family as a result of this experience.  So, woo-hoo for surviving “zero week”!

Why?

So, tonight the Whitley household sits on the cusp of something big and new and life-altering… and it’s a miserable feeling.  The past weeks have been a whirlwind of activity as we prepared for the day that is now upon us, and suddenly time is crawling by as we realize that each thing we do out of routine is now a “one last time” for many months.

Kirby flies out of here tomorrow afternoon.  If we’re lucky, we get to fly to see him for a weekend in 8 1/2 weeks, but that’s looking more and more unlikely with each day.  After that, it’s another 8-9 weeks without him, then he returns to North Carolina, but not necessarily home for an undetermined number of weeks.  So, truth be told, we know that we will definitely see him at the end of May, but that’s all that’s guaranteed at this point.  And we learned today that this reunion may be a short one, as he will most likely be called to do more job-intensive training at Pope AFB upon his return.

It’s all difficult to swallow right now.  I cannot imagine going through each day without him, and without even being able to talk to him.  I’ve not gone this long without talking to him or seeing him is over 14 years, and now we have two girls who count down the minutes until he gets home at the end of a regular workday.  And the scariest part of it all is that we don’t know what the future will hold after all of this… this is just the beginning of the journey.  I know God has called us to this point- there is no doubt in my mind, and I’ve seen His hand in this time and time again throughout the journey thus-far.  I just can’t understand why.

So, for the next 12 hours, we will all weep and cry and hold on to each other, with each hug a bittersweet reminder that these hugs will have to last for what feels like an eternity.  We will try to stay strong for each other, which is funny, because each of us (adults and children alike) just want to curl up and cry… it’s been a vicious cycle.  One at a time we lose control of our emotions while everyone else tries to be tough and make light of the situation, tries to save face… what are we going to do when not one of us can be strong anymore?  What do we do when we all just want to know, “Why?”

It’s all about the sacrifice

As we finished up dinner tonight, Kirby and I started discussing the ins and outs of our finances in the new year.  For those of you who don’t know this, Kirby has joined the Air Force Reserves and will be away for boot camp and special training for what feels like an eternity.  He leaves January 1 (yes, New Year’s Day) and will be gone until some time in May, so I’ll be taking care of everything on the home front.

Now, you have to understand a bit about our family.  I know that the wife is really supposed to be the husband’s helpmate, but around here, our roles are slightly reversed.  I truly do not know how to do anything without my husband’s assistance.  I am blessed to have a husband that leads our home, encourages us to follow the Lord in all we do, provides for us, but also takes care of and helps me in everything.  I’m really quite spoiled when it comes down to it, so January will be a serious reality check in the Whitley household!  To help prepare me for this wake-up call, Kirby was giving me a few lessons on handling our budget.

Well, as we were discussing these adult things, our girls were playing in the living room, appearing to be quite oblivious to our conversation.  I mentioned to Kirby that I don’t really know that we will be able to travel to San Antonio in March to visit and see him graduate.  That trip would mean airfare, hotel costs, food money, and time away from work… it may be possible, but we just don’t know at this point what the future will hold.  We are trying to be realistic with all of this, and so we were reminding each other that we can’t make any promises to ourselves or the girls about that trip.

About that time, my precious Raegan surprised us by speaking up.  “Mommy, you can have all of my money.”  Caught off-guard, Kirby and I looked at each other, then back at her.  She continued, “I have money I’ve been saving in my piggy bank.  We can use all of that to fly on an airplane to go see Daddy.”  My heart swelled as I realized the sacrifice she was willing to make for our family.  She has such a small amount of money, and she has saved it for so long.  She never spends her money, and is always saving for something “important.”  Yet tonight, she was willing to just hand it all over to help her family.

I’m so very grateful that this lesson came to me at this time of the year.  As we near the Christmas holiday, we so often focus on the gifts and the parties, the decorations and the festivities.  And yes, we as Christians celebrate the birth of Christ, recognizing the gift that He offers to us.  However, I know that I personally lose sight of the sacrifice behind that gift.  Christ wasn’t just born into this world like any other child… there was a great sacrifice behind that gift.  Our great God in Heaven sacrificed His Son on our behalf.  And Christ sacrificed His life on a cross for you and for me.  Just as my sweet daughter was willing to give all she had for her dad and I, Jesus gave all that He had for us… and all He had is so very much more than we could ever imagine.  He left a throne in Heaven, for crying out loud!  What more could you ask for?

I pray that as I celebrate Christmas this year, I not only celebrate the birth of our Savior, but I also remember the sacrifice behind this Gift from God… Am I living my life in gratitude for such a great sacrifice?  And am I willing to sacrifice all I have to follow Him?

Updates, but no great insights tonight!

Once again, it’s been ages since I’ve blogged, so I thought now is as good a time as any to do a quick update!  First, I never finished blogging our Cambodia travels… I do have all of it written down on paper, but I just haven’t found the time to type it up.  One day, maybe…

Ironically, it was a bittersweet homecoming.  I was so very grateful to hug my girls and see my family, and to return to my luxurious lifestyle of flushing toilets, hot water, and bugs and reptiles that remain outside.  Yet as everyone asked me about how great it felt to be back home, a small part of me was hesitant.  There was something so amazing, so fulfilling, about waking up each morning knowing that your entire day was going to be centered around prayer and seeing God at work.  I feel guilty even thinking this, much less typing it, but my life here tends to be a little off-centered.  God is not always at the forefront of my day.  (And I know how horrid that sounds, especially coming from a Christian wife and mother and teacher at a Christian school!)  I do try to live my day according to His will and purpose, and I strive to seek Him out in all I do, but there was a very stark difference when I woke up on the “mission field” of Cambodia.

I was determined that I would not slip back into the monotony of my routines.  I was not going to settle for mediocrity, and I would not lose that fire and passion for Him as I woke each day in my comfortable bed and faced my comfortable life.  I was going to refuse to let Satan discourage me, and the problems that I was once so concerned about would no longer take precedence.  I was going to come back and live it right!

Notice I said, “I was.”  It was a grand plan, and I had the best of intentions.  But guess what?  Much to my dismay, life happened all over again.  We came home to a mountain of laundry, needy children, and the horrific fog of extreme jet-lag.  Our jobs had missed us for two weeks, and demanded 110% that first week back- but, oh yea, so did our home and our children!  We were exhausted, but there was no time to rest- after all, had we not just been away on “vacation” for two weeks?  We had to push it, working longer hours than usual and still managing to keep moving once we got home.

Then things started going downhill.  (Yes, I learned that I still had farther down to go).  Our washer went out and flooded half the house. Then I got the call that my grandma had been diagnosed with cancer.  (I’m still reeling from that one).  Then I sideswiped a concrete pole on my way to work.  (Fortunately, no injuries and my van was still drivable).  The washer went out, again (after we thought it was repaired) and flooded the house, again.  As a grand finale to the week, we got smashed on I-40 on our way to celebrate my parent’s anniversary… enough damage that the accident was eleven days ago and we are still looking at another two weeks before we see our van again.  With the accident came damage to my shoulder, which took me out of work (again).  We had issues with the insurance people and went right at a week with no financial help or transportation.

So, I wish I could say that I haven’t been swayed by these events the past two weeks, but to do so would be lying.  I’m struggling.  I’m frustrated and ill, and I want God to step in and make all of this better- right now.  I know the answers- I know He is still in control, and He has a plan and purpose, and that all things happen in His time.  But my human nature is rearing its ugly head right now and wants things to be better!  I know Satan attacks hard when we’re growing closer to God, but God has defeated Satan… so why is the devil still having such a field-day with us right now?  My update has quickly turned into a pity-party, so on that note I am signing off and heading to bed… despite it all, “His mercies are new every morning.”  Bring on the morning!

The Cookies Made Me Cry

I love the way God forces us out of our comfort zone, and then comforts us when we’re out there.  As I mentioned in my last post, the past month has been a roller coaster ride with not a lot of peaks, but quite a bit of falling.  Unfortunately, I haven’t handled things with that poise and grace that is called for in a Proverbs-31-kind-of-woman.  Rather than trust and rest in God’s promises, I have fought the plan and argued, and asked more than my share of “Why?”s.

Yesterday, the cookies made me cry.  And they made me cry more than once.  First, it was a call from a sweet friend with an offer of help with cookie baking.  Sounds silly, I know, but that one offer touched my heart in ways you can’t imagine.  With all that’s been happening in our world lately, simple things like baking Christmas cookies have been an unattainable dream.  There just isn’t time or energy, no matter how hard I try.  Of course, I would never tell anyone that, because it sounds absolutely absurd.  But God heard me anyway, and He didn’t think I was totally nuts- He sent help.  And just in case I didn’t get the message clearly enough, someone else showed up at my house after dinner tonight to give my family a plate of freshly baked cookies to enjoy.  Again, a seemingly small thing, but the tears flowed as I was reminded yet again that my God hears me and loves me enough to answer.

What I have failed to see these past few weeks is the way God has been working all around me.  While I’ve been trying to lock myself in my bathroom and avoid the world, He has been blessing me.  While I have been whining about how awful everything has been, He has been pouring His love all over me.  While I’ve been crying into my pillow, He’s been comforting and consoling me.  While I’ve been running as hard as I can in the opposite direction, He has been right by my side, reminding me that I’m not alone.  And while I’ve been focused on me, myself, and I, He’s been reminding me that not one part of this life is really about me.

Yes, things have been tougher than usual lately.  And no, life is not fair, but no one ever said it should be.  As a good friend texted me today, life isn’t always fair, but it is good.  We just need to open our eyes to the goodness all around us.  As hopeless a cause as I feel these days, He has sent blessing after blessing my way to remind me that there is hope.  I have been overwhelmed by the encouragement from those around me… God knows what we need to hear and when we need to hear it, and I’m so grateful that so many people around me allow Him to use them daily to bring a bit of sunshine into this dark world.

Boats, villages, and mangroves

Today we felt like true missionaries.  We loaded 8 people in an older Toyota Landcruiser, drove down dirt roads that nearly required four-wheel drive, and arrived at the river winding through the largest mangrove forest in the world.  Our boats were waiting for us when we arrived- small, blue boats (like the john-boats we have back home) with wooden bench seats and a canvas roof.  We put six people per boat and cruised through the forest.

Arriving to the first village was an interesting experience.  The village is on a small, hilly island, and the homes are made of wooden slats and built on stilts right in the water.  We had to climb out of our boat into another boat, then onto a platform made of tree limbs (which, by the way, were not so sturdy), and then cross a plank over to the village side.

As we walked by the people, we received an interesting response.  Everyone appeared to be friendly enough, but it almost seemed as if the adults were mocking us in a way.  There was an odd air about them.  However, the children were immediately all over us.  It was quite different from anywhere else we had been… all of the children have been curious about us, but these kids were pretty aggressive.  They wasted no time in grabbing our hands and rubbing us, and some were even hitting.  The only English they know is, “Hello!” so they just kept repeating that to us.

As we walked through the village, it felt a little like being in an old Western town. There were concrete walkways, which Lynette said was most likely from Thai people who had lived there some time ago before being run off.  The buildings were taller, and many had the roofs and porches like the old Western style buildings.  As I said, on one side there were shacks built right on the water, but behind the homes on the other side was pure jungle going up a large hill.  This is where these people believe the spirits live.  They had small pots along the walkway in which they burn things to please the spirits and invite them in.

There was a very odd feeling as we were on this island.  Most of us noticed feeling quite uncomfortable… there was just this suffocating sense of oppression and darkness that I just could not quite put into words.  Later, one of the guys in the other group said that as they walked toward the wat, one man talked to them and said that they would not be welcome there.  Another person said they noticed the monks near the wat glaring at them, which is very unlike any other area we’ve been in.

Today is a special religious day, so the children were out of school.  On this day, they prepare food and offerings and take them to the wat.  Although the children were out of school, they were very eager for us to see their school, and they led us uphill through the jungle.  Their principal met us and unlocked the school so we could see a classroom.  They had a long wooden table in the middle with benches, and there were whiteboards all over the walls, completely covered in Khmer writing.  They also had stacks of books all over the room.  It was very hot, mosquitoes everywhere, and there was no power.

I sat on a bench in the classroom to look around, and the children who had been walking with me immediately started climbing all over me.  Some started rubbing my face, and others started reaching in my pockets and my purse.  I realized what they were doing and tried to stand up, and one girl had already grabbed some trash from my purse.  When I turned around, she was scraping my chewed-up gum out of the trash wrapper into her mouth with her teeth.

It was almost a relief to leave that village, and we headed on down the river to another village.  This time we pulled right up to the shore, and the men were under the trees hand-making fishing boats out of wood.  It was so fascinating to watch them filing down the wood and painting by hand. This island was different in that they have a Christian church and there are believers there, so it was welcoming.  We had a time of worship and devotions in the church, sitting on wooden benches with no electricity on in the heat, and it was amazing.  When you sit in a place like that, you find that those luxuries mean so very little… with no fancy sound system, no fancy seats, no lighting, no air, it’s just you in the presence of the Lord.  Oh, what a lesson we could all learn!  Stripped away of modern comforts, I found myself just really focused on God, and that is where true worship begins.

After our service we had lunch and then climbed the hill to the wat.  It was insanely hot today, and we were struggling.  However, we were distracted from our misery by a young boy who decided to join us.  He is mentally handicapped, but so full of love.  His smile melted me, and we had a great time with him.  He tried to talk to us, but that was difficult with the language barrier, so we did a lot of charades.  He took pictures with my camera and wore my sunglasses, and loved hugs.  He told one of the missionaries after I hugged him that “they love me.”  I so wanted to take him home with me!

At the wat, some of the guys sat down and had tea and bananas with one of the monks.  It was so interesting, and the missionaries were able to discuss religion with him.  As they talked it was interesting to look around and see their prices for services listed all over the building.  They were very kind, though, and very welcoming.

We finished up and took our boats back to town.  It was a lot to take in and process, but a very powerful day.  There are so many people who are so lost and desperately need a touch from the Lord, yet there are so many barriers in the way.  These missionaries need a LOT of prayer!

Awakening Kick-off

Today marked the first official day of the Awakening Prayer Summit.  We had an awesome breakfast at Cafe Laurent, and then piled into the trucks to head to the missionary office for prayer and devotions.  Pastor Dwight led our devotion this morning, and spoke on God-centered prayer.  I’ve heard this idea in so many different ways in so many different places over the past month… making sure our prayers are truly focusing on who God is instead of just rattling off our wish list.  Perhaps God is trying to get this through my thick skull?

After devotions we hit the road, and our first stop was an area off the side of the highway marked by temples and spirit houses.  The view was incredible, a very vivid reminder of how awesome God’s creation is.  You could see forever across the valley with tall, green mountains serving as a backdrop.  Because of this view, Khmer people call on this “mother spirit” here to give protection to the whole area.  They use the temples and spirit houses to burn incense and leave food and drinks as offerings for this spirit.  How incredibly sad that so many are starving to death, yet they will waste the little food they have on an altar for what is essentially a demonic spirit!

At one end of this area was a large pile of stone and rubble where once stood a rather large temple for this particular spirit.  James told us of a missionary some years ago who was deeply troubled by this area of spirit worship and the evil represented by this temple.  He came to the place and poured out his heart to God, asking God to overtake this place and break down these strongholds.  When he returned to this area just days later, the entire temple had collapsed, crumbling the stone idol inside… very powerful.

We spent some time praying over this area and for the Khmer people.  It is so scary to realize that these people are daily calling on a demonic presence.  Satan has such a hold on these people, and they have no idea- this is all they have ever known.

We traveled on to a village area on the side of the highway just over a bridge.  We split into groups to prayer walk through this village, and our group went under the bridge to find just a few homes and stores all made of wooden slats and built on stilts.  We were greeted by their tourism guy, who wanted to sell us a boat tour down the river.  Lynette explained to him what we were doing there, and he just smiled and kept saying, “Amen!”.    We walked around and prayed, and the poverty level was astounding.  Ladies were in a pasture drawing water from a community well while water buffalo rolled in the mud and two children walked their cows down to the river.  It didn’t even seem real.

James stayed up by the highway talking with people during this time, and he was blessed with a great contact.  The missionaries had visited this area previously and passed out videos.  One woman remembered him, told him she had watched the video, and said she wanted to learn more.  (They call people who want to learn more, “Seekers.”)  She expressed interest in joining a Bible study, so they are going back in two weeks to see what they can get started there… this is a huge break for them!

We left there and returned to Koh Kong for a traditional Khmer lunch… I have no idea what it is called, but we were served plates of these large yellow food pockets stuffed with bean sprouts, vegetables, and ground pork.  There was a tray of greens on the table beside it- various types of large lettuce leaves and a lot of different herbs.  We had to tear off a piece of the pocket and place it on a large lettuce leaf, then add some other herbs and roll it up, dip it in peanut sauce, and eat it.  It was very different, unlike anything I’ve ever eaten before.  Even scarier than the food was the bathroom behind the restaurant.  You walked down a path to a cement “outhouse” with a squatter toilet (toilet down in the ground) and a tub of water for “flushing.”  It was pretty gross, and to top it off, this one was equipped with a small plastic mirror on the wall and a toothbrush holder with two used toothbrushes in it (complete with bugs crawling around).  Do they not see how that is a disease waiting to happen?

We moved on to the next section of prayer walking after lunch.  My group started outside of the busiest wat in town, which is the Buddhist temple.  People come here to offer their sacrifices and request special blessings from the monks, and orphan children and misfits are taken in to be cared for by the monks.  It struck me that the people coming in here are so desperately seeking… seeking forgiveness, seeking peace, seeking spiritual fulfillment… but they have it so wrong.  Can they not see that they walk away from that temple completely unchanged?

We moved on to a street known as the “red light district.”  Every woman living on this particular street is a known prostitute, and many of them are stricken with AIDS.  However, their society views this very differently from ours.  Prostitution is just a job… it is a way to make money and provide for your family.  Yet, at the same time, the women are not deemed as marriage material.  They are not allowed to marry.  The Khmer term used to describe them is literally translated, “broken woman.”  Lynette told us of a news interview with one of these women some time ago.  When asked why she would choose this lifestyle that leads to AIDS and death, her response was one that lacked all hope.  She could die doing this job and send money home to her family in the village so they can live, or she could not do this and stay in the village and die from starvation with all of them.

As we walked through we saw several young children playing alone on the porches.  They are children of the prostitutes, exposed to so much more than we could ever imagine.  Their innocent eyes have seen things most of us could not begin to fathom.  One image that will forever haunt me is the sight of a baby crawling around on the porch.  Behind him was the face of a ghost.  She was a very young woman with a ghastly pale face, sunken in cheeks, and vacant eyes.  She was clearly suffering from disease, but more so suffering from this lifestyle of pain and emptiness.  When I looked at her, I was overcome with this deep hurt for her- it was beyond pity.  It was as if my heart literally ached for her.  I was looking into the face of sin and death and destruction, and that picture is forever etched into my mind.

Beautiful view
Gathering to pray
Spirit houses
Idol in the temple
Village under the bridge
Other side of village
Everyone loves a sucker!
Getting water at the well
Traditional Khmer food
Red light district
Red light district

Our first look at Koh Kong

We arrived in Koh Kong by bus, and the traffic was crazy.  James and Pat loaded us up into the trucks and drove us down to the waterfront to our hotel.  I have to admit, at first glance I felt like I was in the tropics!  Beautiful water, sunshine, palm trees, and sitting areas under straw roofs… not such a bad deal!  But I was snapped back into reality by the stench of burning trash and fish and shrimp, and the sight of open tanks full of crawfish and eels outside the restaurant of our hotel.  Our room has great air conditioning and a mini-fridge, but Kirby had to capture a lizard off the wall and we learned quickly that running water is apparently a luxury that we don’t always have!

We took off this evening to check out the gym that the missionaries run here in Koh Kong.  It has a tin roof and is so hot inside!  They have an area with weights and benches, several ping pong tables, badminton, stationary bikes, resistance bands, hula hoops, and an area with a screen for aerobics (a big hit with the ladies!).

The gym is vital to the ministry here.  In the U.S. we tend to think of missionaries as people who just go up and down the street handing out Gospel tracks and leading people through the prayer of salvation left and right.  That is such a misconception!  Mission work here in Cambodia is a long, slow process… it takes years to build relationships, and it takes a miracle from God to lead these people to the Truth.  The culture is so very different from what we are accustomed to, and people are not very open to emotions and discussing their thoughts and feelings.  Personal relationships have to be worked at over long periods of time, and on top of that, the Khmer people are heavily entrenched in the throws of Buddhism.  It is all they know and have ever known… many have never even heard the name of Jesus.  Asking them to consider His word as truth is asking them to turn their backs on everything they’ve ever known, to take a step away from their family, culture, and heritage… it is not an easy task, but through His power lives are being changed.  It just takes a great deal of patience and time, and us Westerners are not too keen on that.  We want results, and we want them now!

Through the gym ministry, people are coming to know Christ.  They come in to work out and have some fun, and the missionaries get to see the same people on a regular basis.  That is where relationship building begins.  They get to learn about the lives of people, get to know them a little more personally each day, and they earn trust and respect.  They are also building their network in this area… as they get to know individuals, those individuals lead them to other individuals, and they are able to connect with people they otherwise may have never seen.  It just takes time.

We walked outside the gym, and as we stood there several children came up.  They would taunt each other to get closer and closer to us, and we started playing around with them.  They were so full of giggles and smiles, and so eager for attention!  Kirby gave them suckers, which they snatched right up and started eating instantly (after they threw their wrappers on the ground- even adults do that here).  They ran off to a group of older kids standing on the corner, and then one of the boys came back begging for money.  The older kids put him up to it, and Lynette explained to him that he shouldn’t do that.  It is amazing how early they learn to beg.

Of course, through all of that, the mama in me wanted to scream, “Where are your parents?!”  I would never allow my children to roam the street and accept candy from strangers.  But, this is a different world.

Our hotel.. Koh Kong Bay
The gym in Koh Kong

Bus rides in Cambodia are NO fun!

Jet lag kicked in today… I woke up every hour overnight, and then gave up around 3.  Worked out great, though, because I got to chat with Raegan!  We had breakfast at the guesthouse (scrambled eggs and homemade muffins), then headed to catch our bus in downtown Phnom Penh.  Even though it was only about 7:00 in the morning, the city was bustling all over.  The missionary giving us a ride said the people are up and working by the time the sun rises around 6:00.  A little hard for this lazy person to fathom!

We loaded our bus, which was quite an experience.  Our luggage went on the bottom, then we climbed up to sit in the upper section.  It was similar to an American charter bus, but much dirtier!  They played very loud Khmer music the whole time, and we were definitely in the minority.

The scenery along the way was amazing… we would see the big city, then suddenly it would a totally impoverished area.  It quickly changes from one extreme to another near the cities, and then you only see poverty when you get into the more rural areas.  About halfway through the bus ride we stopped at a roadside stop for a bathroom and lunch break.  We had lunch packed from the missionaries- they said the food is unsafe in those type of stops, and I could see why when I went to the bathroom.  I had to walk down an alley between the building lined with stinky garbage, and dogs and cats were roaming about.  Toward the end we saw a pile of fish they were using for food, just lying out in the midst of all the nastiness.

The bathrooms were squatters- a cement building with a hole in the ground and a tub of water for flushing.  We had to quickly jump back on the bus and hit the road again, and it was miserable!  It was a long, slow trip through the mountains- beautiful, but after a few hours that doesn’t matter so much.  We were so relieved to reach Koh Kong.

A sobering experience

So, we all slept hard all night, and woke up around 8:00 this morning just in time for breakfast- American style!  The guest house served scrambled eggs, pancakes, and fresh pineapple.  It was so yummy!  After eating, we all piled into a van and rode to Tuol Sleng, the genocide museum from the rise of Khmer Rouge.  It was a former high school converted into a torture center at the height of the Khmer Rouge rule… it was so disturbing to walk through the halls and see the remnants of torture chambers, blood-stained floors, and photographs of innocent victims.  It is so hard to fathom such evil.

After such a depressing adventure, we moved on to a happier place- the waterfront in front of the king’s palace.  It almost felt like I was at Epcot center in Disney!  The waterfront was lined with flags flying for every nation imaginable (even an American flag!), and there were banners and signs everywhere.  Today is the king’s birthday, which is a holiday here.  It was quite festive and the city was bustling with excitement.  We walked around and took pictures, looking like the true tourists that we are.  The Cambodians had a good time laughing at us, but the teasing was good-natured and they were all really friendly.  We had lunch at a great restaurant, and the food was delicious!  (Cashew chicken for me- yum!)

We then went on to visit the Killing Fields, the area where millions of Cambodians were executed by Khmer Rouge soldiers.  There were empty mass graves, and a huge memorial in the center full of bones and skulls of the victims.  It was a beautiful area, yet haunting as everyone learned of the horrific events that took place there.  As we stood in front of the “Killing Tree,” I was overwhelmed at how easily evil can consume a person if he/she allows it.

We traveled back to our guest house, and spend the remainder of the evening resting.  Tomorrow we board a bus and take a 5-6 hour bus ride through the mountains to our next destination, Koh Kong.  Praising God for safety, protection, and provision, and for providing a loving relationship of freedom in Christ!

Tuol Sleng
Tuol Sleng
Phnom Penh
Phnom Penh
Phnom Penh
Phnom Penh
King’s palace in Phnom Penh
Killing Fields
Killing Tree at the Killing Fields
Mass graves at the Killing Fields